You never know how hard it is to act after being cheated on until you’ve been cheated on. There’s a huge rush of emotion that fills you that can make it impossible to act rationally when you find out, or even act at all.
The worst is when you hear it from someone else that your significant other was with someone who wasn’t you, and you have to figure out what to do when you’ve been cheated on all on your own.
Sure, you can ask friends and sometimes even family, but everyone deals with being cheated on differently. So, someone might tell you to just break up with him without listening to his explanation about why he did it, but if you’re the type of person to talk about everything with your man, this strategy isn’t going to work.
Someone else might tell you to burn all of his crap, but for a person who just wants the truth, there’s no need to light his possessions on fire because chances are he isn’t going to want to talk to you after that.
So, like I said, only you can figure out what to do after hearing the news. I know it’s hard to think about, believe me. I am a very non-confrontational person, and the thought of having to confront a partner after hearing news that they’ve cheated on me — even if I’m furious — confronting a cheating partner is a conversation I would like to never have.
But, unfortunately, just because you don’t want to be cheated on doesn’t mean it might not happen. People cheat for different reasons.
Sometimes, they’re unhappy in their current relationship and want someone to be there for them on a more emotional level than their partner is. Or maybe they just want mind-blowing sex that’s not the same old, same old they get at home. I’m not condoning cheating in the least here.
If you’re really that unhappy in your relationship, your first plan of action should be to talk and communicate and listen to your partner — not jump into bed with someone else.
And if you’re like, “nope, I don’t talk, I just make things happen,” then I guess that’s your answer; no use staying in a relationship if all you care about is yourself, not the other person.
But this isn’t about the cheaters. This is about those who have been cheated on and what to do when you find out he has cheated on you. Because, as I said before, we all handle cheating differently.
And based on your horoscope, the remedy to get over your loser ex may be as simple as crying it out, trying to forgive him, and sometimes, yes, even burning his things (or at least the things he’s given you).
So, if you find yourself in this dumpster fire of a situation, look to astrology to help you figure out what to do.
Because sometimes giving into your zodiac sign’s basic needs and wants might actually make you feel better than if you just listened to someone else tell you how to deal with it.
Getting cheated on is not something that Aries takes lightly, whether she’s been dating that person for a few weeks or a few years. She’s not one to leave the relationship without answers, but she also believes that there should be some punishment for breaking her heart. Some people might think that Aries isn’t someone who can get her heart broken, but if you put her in a situation like this, anything can happen.
When Aries finds out that she’s been cheated on, her immediate reaction is to get revenge on her significant other. Not only does she want him to know that she knows, she wants it to hurt when he finds out that the relationship is over. Quite frankly, she doesn’t really give a crap if he’s sorry or that he wishes the relationship were over, too. She only wants to get her revenge and let him pick up the pieces.
When Taurus finds out that she has been cheated on, she is distraught – and with good reason, too. But instead of cursing out her partner or going to her friends for support, she completely closes herself off from everyone in her life… except her partner. She might try to get some sympathy from her man or even forgive him without a second thought, but for the most part, she holes herself up in her room until she’s done being sad.
This method can work for a little bit, but in reality, ignoring the situation doesn’t do Taurus any good. She knows that she’s hurt and chances are pretty good that she already knows how she wants this to play out, but sitting and stewing in her emotions only makes her feel worse. If anything, she should look to her friends for support and guidance instead of feeling embarrassed or burdensome.
Being cheated on can make Gemini feel incredibly conflicted. As the twins of the zodiac, she feels a lot of different emotions at once. She wants to scream at her partner, but she doesn’t even want to give him the satisfaction. She wants to leave him for good, but she wants to hear him out. She tries to make decisions with her brain, not her heart, but when you love someone that can be way easier said than done.
One thing Gemini DOES manage to do is cut off all communication with her guy. Yes, she’s angry and yes, she still wants to talk it out before she makes a decision, but she knows that being cheated on isn’t the same as having a fight; it’s a betrayal of trust and love. And she knows that letting him influence her is only going to make it worse. So she blocks him on all social media and lets her heart and head battle it out.
Love is hard; it isn’t just black and white. There are a lot of things to consider when it comes to the highs AND the lows of a relationship. And just because Cancer’s been cheated on doesn’t mean that the relationship is doomed. Of course, some people find her utterly crazy for not dumping his ass, but Cancer really does want to figure it all out first before she decides to leave or stay.
Of course, Cancer also knows that she can be crazy emotional — and she is when she first finds out – which is why she doesn’t trust herself to handle the next steps alone.
She would rather go to couples counseling not only to get the help and opinion of a professional but to be able to duke it out in a safe environment. Screaming and crying isn’t going to help, but healing together just might.
Leo tries to do everything in life with deliberation and intention; you’ll never catch her doing something just for the hell of it. So, by this way of thinking, she feels like her partner probably cheated on her for a specific reason — not just because there was an opportunity to do so. Of course, she might be way off base and it WAS just because of an opportunity, but she isn’t satisfied with that answer until she knows for sure.
When Leo finds out she has been cheated on, her first step is to talk it out with her partner. It’s going to be hard and there will be tears, but it’s the act of hearing it firsthand as soon as possible that makes it easier to swallow.
She doesn’t want to let him sit on it and change his mind or ignore him and change her OWN mind, so she does the hard part first. I’m not saying this talk isn’t going to be ugly, but it might just help.
Virgo knows that being cheated on is heartbreaking and can make you feel lost, but she also knows that no one is perfect. That’s not a green light to let all of her partners cheat on her, but she does try to see the situation from her man’s perspective. This means trying to forgive him, even when she can barely stand to look at him.
She isn’t forgiving because she’d rather not deal with it, but rather because she wants to give him the benefit of the doubt. They might never get back together again, but she doesn’t have to keep feeling hatred towards him. Forgiveness takes time, but Virgo is willing to put in the work as long as her ex proves that cheating on her wasn’t done out of animosity for the relationship. Sounds a little convoluted, but Virgo has her reasons.
When Libra finds out that she’s been cheated on, she can be incredibly vindictive and spiteful. She would get revenge on her (now) ex, but she feels like that is way too easy. She would much rather get even and do to him exactly what he did to her. That means only one thing – she cheats on him with someone else; preferably his best friend or sibling.
Not only does Libra want this break up to hurt, she wants him to remember that she isn’t someone to mess with for years to come. She can be really mean when she wants to be, but hides it very well until she’s ready to unleash the monster within. She might pretend to forgive her guy, but as soon as she gets an opportunity, she is willing to tear him down.
Cheating is all about dishonesty and breaking trust — two things Scorpio absolutely cannot stand in a relationship. But she’s also not dumb. She knows that if she blows up at her partner and then break it off, not hearing the reason why he cheated will haunt her forever. But she doesn’t just want the reason why; she wants all the sordid details.
Hey, it’s her relationship, she has a right to know what happened!
When Scorpio is hurt, she can either be scary calm or totally wild. How she acts isn’t the point, though. She really just wants her S.O. to be honest before she dumps his ass. She wants all of the facts so she can put them all together in her own time, but it’s important for it to be face to face.
She’s like a human lie detector — it’s almost impossible to lie to her, which means she gets the answers she needs from her partner.
Sagittarius’ mindset after being cheated on is usually, “Yep, I told you this would happen.” Maybe she’s cheated a few times, maybe she’s been cheated on a few more, but Sagittarius is ultimately hurt because she was fooled into a serious relationship. She’s all about having fun and enjoying life, and getting serious with someone pretty much goes against everything she believes.
So when she’s been cheated on, her first reaction is to get drunk and get laid. Clearly, sex and love don’t matter anymore, so why should she care? Yes, this is destructive behavior that will end up creeping up on her a few months down the road, but it’s how she copes.
It might take her awhile to trust again, but can you blame her? I’d probably do the same exact thing in her situation. At least her reaction is the most relatable.
Relationships to Capricorn are meant to be taken seriously. And nothing says “anything BUT serious” like cheating. Capricorn may try to be her mature self when she first finds out that she has been cheated on, but she’s also known for being condescending and short-tempered, which means her partner isn’t getting off that easily.
In fact, her thinking is that her man took away something she loved, so she’s going to take away something he loves. Sounds pretty fair, right?
And in true Capricorn fashion, when she finds out what he has been doing behind her back, she decides that the only thing she CAN do to show him how upset she is would be to burn all of his things. If she has a balcony, all of his precious breakable things are going off of it.
But for the most part, she wants to inflict damage on his possessions and show him that she isn’t someone to mess with. It’s a harsh punishment, obviously, but this is how she copes with being cheated on.
Aquarius wishes that she could be as calculated with her punishments as some signs and as forgiving as others, but when she finds out that she has been cheated on, there’s way too much going on inside her head for her to really make a definitive move. She knows that she should be furious (and she is), but she wants to make her next words and actions count, which for her, takes some time.
So, in the meantime, Aquarius does what everyone should do when they first find out – take a break from the relationship.
It sounds so easy and yet so unimaginative, but Aquarius isn’t thinking about how to best hurt her partner. What she really wants to do is take care of herself and her own feelings. Like a few of the other signs, being in a serious relationship is a big deal for her and when something bad happens, she questions whether she would be better off alone or not.
So, by taking a break from talking to him, spending time with him, and even just being around him, she’s allowing herself to really decide what she wants to do next — maybe slash his tires, maybe cut him out for good.
When Pisces finds out that she has been cheated on, she goes into total break-down mode. This is a relationship that she has been investing in for however long and all of a sudden, it’s over. Just like that.
Pisces might seem like a pushover, but she’s actually a lot stronger than people realize. That means that cheating is an inexcusable offense and she can’t forgive it. Chances are pretty good that she won’t hear about the news from her S.O.’s mouth, but rather from the person he cheated with or a friend who saw him with not-you.
It’s a huge blow to hear that she’s been cheated on because Pisces puts in so much effort. She tries her hardest when it comes to being a good girlfriend and lover that she really questions her place in everyone’s lives. Her go-to reaction to this news is to cry it out until she has to rehydrate before crying again.
She always calls on her friends when she’s sad and this is no exception. Whether they bring over comfort food, movies, or a shiny new poster of Channing Tatum’s abs to make her feel better, Pisces knows that sometimes you need to be sad before you can get over it.
Emily Ratay is a full-time writer living in Pittsburgh. She’s passionate about the environment and feminism, and knows that anything is possible in the right pair of shoes. She plans on writing a book in the future.