Do you know the difference between lust and love? For some of us, the difference is obvious. One comes with noncommittal feelings and casual hookups, while the other is a deep bond with someone you really care about.
But even then, it can be hard to tell. Are you really in love with this person or do you just feel a very strong attraction to him? Do you actually love her or do you just love the attention you get from her?
Listen, I get it – I’ve had to ask myself these questions before, just like I’m sure you have, too. And no zodiac sign is immune to having to confront the question of whether they’re in love or in lust.
Let’s break it down. Lust is a feeling you have for someone that is driven mostly by desire. This is the stage of the relationship where “want” is a very real factor in keeping you together.
You want each other right now, usually on an intimate level. Emotional connections? Not so much. Lots of sex? Yes, absolutely.
Many times, when people are lusting after someone else, they tend to exhibit shallow behavior, like focusing more on their partner’s physical appearance and keeping things as casual as possible without getting too personal with one another.
When you’re in love with someone, it’s a totally different feeling. Love takes patience, but when it’s real, it can last for a long time.
Love is a deep attachment you have for someone that goes beyond sex and physical intimacy.
It’s about seeing your partner’s strengths and weaknesses, and loving and accepting the person underneath it all, no matter what.
While it might seem like love and lust are so different from each other when you lay it out this way, the first time you feel lovestruck by someone, it can feel like lust (or vice versa).
Our bodies and minds do crazy things when we’re really into someone, so it’s easy to see how we can confuse love and lust. And rather than asking yourself questions that are probably just going to confuse you more, looking to astrology for answers might help.
Each zodiac sign experiencing love and lust differently and only your horoscope can tell you how to know which one is which. Keep reading to tell if you’ve fallen in love or lust, according to astrology,by zodiac sign.
ARIES (March 21 – April 19)
If you’ve fallen in lust, Aries, you don’t find yourself caring too much about the important things in your partner’s life. Sure, you two have a lot of fun when you’re together, but when he mentions something that’s important to him, you find yourself not really listening or caring. It’s not so much that you ignore him, you just kind of make a noncommittal noise and change the subject to something else.
When you’re in love, you want to learn from your partner. For you, love is motivating each other to be a better person. No one is a bigger cheerleader to your partner than you are, and when you’re together, your love of competition turns into you two against the world, rather than you always trying to one up your partner. His accomplishments feel like your accomplishments, and you couldn’t be happier for him.
TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)
For you, Taurus, lust is being lovers that only care about the physical part of the relationship. Whenever you’re with your partner, you want to seduce and romance him. Every night together feels like Netflix and chill, and you probably only ever chill on the weekends or at night. You’re also more comfortable telling people that you two are lovers than saying that you’re dating or even friends.
When you’re in love, you think of your partner as your best friend. You two are like friends with benefits, except the benefits are that you get to be in love with your BFF. You’ll know it’s love when you feel like you can come to your partner with problems, gossip, and everything in between. And you also know that intimacy doesn’t define your relationship because you actually want to build a strong foundation together.
GEMINI (May 21 – June 20)
When you’re in lust, Gemini, you have a hard time opening up to your partner. You either feel like your problems don’t have a place in this relationship or that you shouldn’t even be bothering him with what’s going on in your personal life, but either way, you leave your problems at home where they won’t bother anyone.
Love is a lot different, though. When you’re in love, you’re able to open up to your partner and talk candidly. Whether that means venting about your dysfunctional family or talking about how the future makes you nervous, the conversation just flows when you’re together. You’re already a chatty person, but with someone you love, you know you can let your guard down in a safe space and speak from the heart.
CANCER (June 21 – July 22)
When you’re in lust, Cancer, you tend to keep quiet about your relationship. It’s not so much that you’re hiding him from the world; it’s just that you want to make sure that this is a relationship you want before you share it with everyone you know. You might even go so far as to tell your closest friends that you’re seeing someone, but you don’t really spill any more details beyond a name and what he looks like.
When you’re in love, however, you couldn’t be more vocal about your relationship. You’ll become the couple everyone wants to hate because you’re always on social media being cute, but you’re just too darn cute to really hate. Love is wanting to meet your partner’s friends and family and bringing him to meet your own family. And if you could shout your love from the mountains, you definitely would.
LEO (July 23 – August 22)
Leo, lust is making more of an effort to wow your partner. You already dress to the nines, but when you’re in lust, you kick it up a few more notches. For other zodiac signs, this would look like they were trying too hard to impress, but you’re able to get away with it. That said, you still feel slightly uncomfortable around him, as if you’re pretending to be someone you’re not (which is exactly what you’re doing).
When you’re in love, you allow yourself to get comfortable in the relationship. Love is not allowing anyone –especially your partner – change who you are. If you want to dress to the nines one day and chill in sweatpants with dried food on them the next, you do it proudly instead of hiding that part of you away. To you, being in love is letting yourself be a hot mess around your partner sometimes and loving every minute of it.
VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)
Virgo, you can’t help but zero in on someone’s flaws – it’s just something you’re so attuned to! And you don’t do it just to call someone out on it; you’ve just always been someone who focuses on the small details instead of the big picture. But when you’re in lust, you make an effort to look past your partner’s flaws… even if they make him totally annoying.
When you’re in love, you’re much more like yourself. To you, love is pointing out his mistakes (and your own) and admitting when you’re wrong. You don’t let yourself settle for just anyone, and everyone knows that a relationship built on honesty from the beginning is what makes it last a long time. Love is embracing each other’s flaws, rather than hoping that if you ignore it long enough that it’ll go away eventually.
LIBRA (September 23 – October 22)
Libra, you’re no stranger to lust OR love, but you know that the best relationships have that perfect balance between the two. To you, lust is letting yourself be a little shallow. Instead of being with your partner because he’s kind-hearted and funny, you’re with him because he has a nice butt and a broad chest. You know it’s shallow, but you also don’t care that much.
When you’re in love, you’re able to find that balance a little more easily (because this time, you actually like your partner for who he is). Love is adoring your partner no matter what he looks like because you know that it’s what’s on the inside that matters most. Of course, it is always a little bonus when he has a heart of gold and a nice butt, isn’t it?
SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)
When you’re in lust, Scorpio, you find yourself telling your partner what he wants to hear. You don’t really care so much about speaking your mind or being your usual, honest self because you want to keep things fun and lighthearted. You know that acting like yourself means that you see the relationship getting serious, and you’re not entirely sure that’s what you want just yet.
When you do think you might be in love, you start to open up more. I know it’s hard to let yourself be vulnerable because your heart might still get broken, but it’s that risk that always makes love worth it. Love is being honest and open with each other. You want to tell him your secrets and you find yourself listening intently to everything he has to say because it’s important to you to know every part of this person.
SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21)
Sagittarius, you’ve always been sort of a lone wolf. You like keeping things temporary and short because it makes sense to you. Why lock yourself down to someone for a long time when you can have just as much fun with more than one partner, right? Lust is keeping things casual because you never know when you’ll find someone else you like more.
Love might not be a familiar concept to you just yet, especially if you always find yourself going after the casual hookups, but when you are in love, you’ll know. To you, love is knowing your partner like the back of your own hand. You know exactly where he wants to go for dinner, you always know when he needs a pick-me-up after a long day at work, and you swear you can read his mind when you’re together. Yup, that’s love!
CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)
Capricorn, you like to think you know when you love someone and when you’re really just lusting after him. You are one of the few zodiac signs that always sees a potential long-term partner when you date, after all! But being in lust and being in love are two very different feelings for you. When you’re in lust, you only care about living in the moment. When you’re together, you find yourself only making plans for that night.
When you’re in love, you find yourself thinking months or even years into the future. When you think about where you’ll be in five years, your partner is there in your imagination; that means something. Love is welcoming your future together with excitement. You know that this is who you want to be with, and you’re not afraid to talk about the future with each other instead of only making plans for that weekend.
AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18)
Aquarius, you’re another one of those zodiac signs that prefers to keep things casual and light when you date. To you, relationships are incredibly meaningful. If you’re not going to find your soulmate in someone, then you don’t want to date him. A soulmate is someone you can vibe with on another level. Lust, however, is being someone you’re not because you don’t see your partner as someone who will stick around.
When it comes to love, you know right away if it’s real. Love to you is being able to enjoy each other’s company comfortably because you’ve finally found your soulmate. Rather than pretending like you’re someone you’re not, you let your freak flag fly. You want to get to know this person on an intimate level, which means showing him your weird, yet incredibly charming side without embarrassment.
PISCES (February 19 – March 20)
Pisces, you always feel like you have to present yourself with a filter when you first start dating someone – just until they’re comfortable with you, that is. But you don’t open up to just anyone, either. When you’re in lust, you feel like you tend to change who you are to seem more intriguing or attractive to your partner. You never really get to be your whole self when you’re driven by lust.
When you’re in love, however, all of that fakeness goes out the window. Love is being yourself, warts and all. You let yourself be emotionally open more freely, and you let him know upfront that if he’s going to be with you, he needs to know exactly what he’s in for. The perfect relationship only works in a fantasy world, and you know that love is much better when you embrace reality instead of playing make-believe.
Emily Ratay is a full-time writer living in Pittsburgh. She’s passionate about the environment and feminism, and knows that anything is possible in the right pair of shoes. She plans on writing a non-fiction book in the future.