The Law of Attraction is the belief that “like attracts like,” and that by focusing on positive thoughts we can bring about positive results.
If you’ve been trying to figure out how to find your soulmate, understanding and following a few simple steps will empower you to manifest and attract the lifelong partner you seek.
There is nothing you cannot be, do, or have when you know how to activate and use the unlimited power that lies within you.
While there are plenty of depictions in movies and fairy tales, simply put, a soulmate is defined as a “person who is perfectly suited to another in temperament [or] a person who strongly resembles another in attitudes or beliefs.”
Some people are lucky enough to find a soul connection where two people connect easily and instantly. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t work involved in finding your special someone.
That said, the process can be a fun and healthy one.
How to Find Your Soulmate Using the Law of Attraction
1. Get clear about what you really want.
Each failed relationship in your past has given you clues about what you want in your ideal partner. The problem is, many people focus on the negative instead of the positive.
For example, by saying that you don’t want a man who “puts his work before the relationship,” you are focusing on a man who puts work before love and that is the desire you are unconsciously sending out through your energy.
The good news is, if you know what you don’t want, you know what you do want. Your power to create lies in your ability to choose thoughts that are positively clear so that you can tell the universe exactly what you desire. (For example, “I want a man who puts me first and loves me unconditionally.”)
You can tell if your affirmation is positive or negative by the way it makes you feel. If it makes you feel great, it is positive. If it makes you feel bad, it is negative. It’s that simple.
If you find yourself thinking negative thoughts, simply turn them around and start focusing on the positive. You will immediately feel better and you will be in alignment with love.
2. Envision the love you desire and feel the feeling as though you already have it.
If you are ready for love, one of the best things you can do is get lost in day-dreaming about your perfect mate.
As you imagine your ideal partner, the universe receives these images as indicators of what to create in your life. In your imagination, you can create and improve on your desired relationship until it meets your highest ideal.
Once you have that ideal image in your mind, replay it over and over, until one day you will find yourself actually living it. The power of your imagination is unstoppable and can transform your love life.
3. Fall in love with yourself.
When we judge or criticize ourselves too harshly and too often, we’re prone to send out an energy that repels others. Self-criticism is a negative energy that may repel potential mates.
On the other hand, self-love is often attractive and attracts potential mates.
Make a list of ten characteristics you love about yourself and put this list where you can see it every day. It doesn’t really matter what is on the list as long as it easily generates good feelings that you have toward yourself.
The more you focus on what you love about yourself, the more self-love you will experience. Others will fall in love with you, too, simply because it feels great to be around people who love themselves.
4. Say no to jealousy.
It’s natural to feel jealous when we see someone experiencing something we desire and don’t have, but jealousy will actually keep love from coming to you. Jealousy is a negative emotion and will repel what you desire.
Instead of feeling jealous, understand if you are seeing someone else living your dream, your dream is getting closer.
Rather than being jealous, celebrate the love you see and bless all the loving relationships you witness. In this way, you are telling the universe to bring you some of that.
5. Refuse to give up.
The number one reason the Law of Attraction doesn’t appear to work is that people give up before their wish is granted. It’s like ordering a delicious meal and walking out of the diner before your order arrives. The order is on its way, but if you are no longer in alignment with it, you will miss out.
When it comes to love, people get disappointed when their dates don’t meet their expectations and they don’t see evidence that true love is coming. Out of disappointment or fear of being disappointed, they give up, never knowing what they missed.
The key to the Law of Attraction is that once you are clear you desire something specific, you must commit to it for as long as it takes to manifest in your life and as long as it takes to finally meet your soulmate.
Photo: Dean Drobot / Shutterstock
6. Remain firm against doubt.
We live in an obliging universe where it is possible to experience all our dreams and desires.
One of the biggest obstacles in manifesting what we desire is doubt. We want something, but we doubt that it’s possible. It’s actually the doubt that keeps it from coming.
Knowing is a positive energy and opens the door for attraction. Doubt is a negative energy and closes that same door. When you are in alignment with attracting your perfect mate, there is a sense of knowing he/she is on their way.
7. Enjoy yourself in the present moment.
Don’t wait for love to find you in order to start living.
You will attract what you are: if you are a couch potato, you will attract a coach potato. If you desire a mate who is active, goes skiing and likes to read, you better start jogging, getting on the slopes and hanging out in the bookstore.
Don’t wait for him/her to arrive in order to live your best life. Start living your best life right now and you will become super-attractive so that special person will be able to spot you in a crowd.
8. Become the future you.
There is a current “single you,” and a future partnered or married you.
One of the best ways to use the Law of Attraction to attract your perfect guy or girl is to become the person who is already in the relationship.
This is how it works: think of yourself now and think of yourself in your perfect relationship. How are you different? Who do you become once you are in the relationship?
Maybe your answer is, “I become relaxed, confident, loving and kind.” Your answer is your clue to who you must become now.
Don’t wait for the relationship to manifest; you must first become the person who already has these qualities. This includes preparing your space for the partner of your dreams: Clean out your closet, empty a drawer, or replace that worn-out wallpaper.
Think of all the ways in which you can prepare yourself and your life to be in perfect alignment with your perfect mate.
9. Get your beliefs in order.
Examine your beliefs about love and clean up any beliefs that don’t support attracting, having and keeping your perfect relationship: “I’m not attractive enough.” “I don’t make enough money.” “All the good ones are taken.”
The universe has a way of making your beliefs true, so if a belief doesn’t support what you really want, it is time to drop it and develop beliefs that do. The universe responds to your feelings about yourself; if you are feeling unworthy or undeserving, the universe reflects this back.
10. Stop questioning how it will happen and trust that it will.
We live in a magical universe that can bring you exactly what you desire in the most amazing and even unbelievable ways. Getting caught up in the how can actually impede the Law of Attraction.
Your job is to clearly and positively define what you most desire and to get in alignment with your desire through all the ways described above. Your job is not the how, so don’t get caught up on how it’s going to happen.
If you are trying to control the how, you are likely getting in the way and making it more difficult than it has to be. Instead, let go of any ideas about how it has to happen and allow the universe to do its magic.
Photo: Vovatol / Shutterstock
This doesn’t mean you sit home and do nothing.
The difference is that you await inspired action. Inspired action is that sudden feeling you should go the coffee shop even if you are not thirsty, or you should get gas on the other side of the street.
The Law of Attraction communicates to you through your intuition, so make sure you are listening and following your gut feelings.
Most of all, be open to all possibilities — you never know how the universe will deliver.
Nanice Ellis is a Master NLP Practitioner, Theta Healer, and Transpersonal Life Coach. Visit her website for more.