Falling in love is easy, but staying in love is much more difficult.
Keeping the fire burning is something very special.
The relationship is not just sex, passionate kisses, tight hugs, touching confessions, or long evening walks under the stars.
It’s also an everyday work of each partner and continuous self-improvement for the sake of being together.
Some people say they would prefer a short affair to a long-term relationship.
But, if you truly love your partner, you will definitely want to know how to keep a long-term relationship with him or her.
To tell the truth, there is no single recipe for a successful relationship.
Luckily, using the experience of other couples, psychologists managed to develop a list of some valuable pieces of advice that can help you to make your long-term soulmate happy:
1. Show your love.
Remember that, similarly to friendship, the feeling of love is expressed not in words, but in actions.
It doesn’t mean that you should catch the star for your lover or follow them everywhere like a caring parent.
Simple support when dealing with mundane things can be a great sign of your love.
Ask your partner what they need the most and cannot accomplish right now.
Then, think about how you can support them in this situation.
If your partner is a student, help them with their studies.
If he or she works a lot, arrange the leisure time together.
If your soulmate needs to visit a doctor, go to the clinic together.
Any relevant help or support from you will make your partner feel loved, safe and happy, which is key to the long-term relationship.
2. Keep the flirting alive.
Flirting is one of the main drivers of long-term relationships.
Just like the flower cannot blossom and grow without water and the sun, you cannot build a solid long-lasting relationship without constant flirting.
Flirting gives positive energy and strengthens your love.
So, things like spontaneous gifts, compliments, love messages, or flirting over text should be present in couples’ everyday lives.
It will distract you from the monotonous daily routine and help you focus on each other.
3. Make time together a priority.
Despite being completely engaged in work, child’s care, or domestic chores, you should always find extra time to spend together.
All these outside factors can threaten your long-lasting relationship, as they gradually create a huge distance between couples.
So, try to spend a day or a night out together at least once in two weeks.
It’s a perfect way for both of you to concentrate on your partner’s identity and reinforce your feelings towards each other.
Keep in mind that a relationship requires a recharge, like a device in order to be able to function for many years, and spending time together is the most appropriate way to refresh your connection.
4. Respect your partner
Many old couples admit that mutual respect is the basis of love.
No matter how strong your feelings are, a long-term relationship will break up quickly if you don’t respect your soulmate.
A mental comfort of partners is essential to keep relationships long.
To develop mutual respect, never argue in public.
You can criticize each other’s behavior or some personal traits but always do that face-to-face and in a calm and friendly conversation.
And always remember that criticism in relation to your partner should be relevant, adequate, and most importantly, not frequent.
Jealousy is another important sign of disrespect that can significantly threaten your relationship.
You shouldn’t suspect your partner is cheating if you’ve never caught him or her red-handed or haven’t got any proof.
The groundless accusation is a clear indication that there is a gap in trust, understanding, and respect.
5. Do not try to change your partner.
All people are unique and have their own strengths and weaknesses.
It’s fine to motivate your partner to become better because relationshірs should foster mental growth, not degradation.
But, you should tolerate each other’s imperfections.
Don’t force your partners to get rid of the traits that are parts of their identity.
For example, if your boyfriend or girlfriend is laughing too loud in your company or they are obsessed with their hobbies, try to respect some of their habits and interests.
By allowing your lover to stay the way he or she is, you can foster open and honest communication between you.
This tip is a valuable answer to the question of how to maintain a long-term relationship.
Let’s acknowledge that people want others to accept their identities, interests, and desires.
If you respect and tolerate your soulmate, they will treat you the same way.
Christine Day is a writer who focuses on relationships, love, and marriage. She has been featured in Medium, The Good Men Project, Napa Valley Register, The Advocate (Baton Rouge, LA), Missoulian, and more.
This article was originally published at The Good Men Project. Reprinted with permission from the author.